Think Deep

Recently, I had a conversation with a friend. This particular friend shared a lot about profound experiences that they have had so far in their lifetime. They asked me about mine. I was a little dumbfounded when I tried to think up an answer.

I guess that I have had a lot of somewhat profound experiences. One of the earliest I can remember is the birth of my brother, Beau John. I was 7 years old when my youngest sibling was born and I remember every little detail about the day. I remember my dad calling the house to tell my aunt (who was watching us) that we had a little boy. Carly and I were overjoyed to add a brother to our family. I remember visiting him at the hospital and marveling over his tiny little body. I remember holding him and getting a Barbie doll present for being a sister (Ha). I remember my parents couldn't think of a name for him for three days and finally they settled on BEAU and it was just perfect for him. That was pretty profound.

I remember losing my grandfather in one of the most profound ways. June 17th 2005. I had spent the past three months watching my grandfather slowly succumb to the battle of lung cancer. Literally, I watched him cough up bloody pieces of his own lung. It was absolutely horrible. The week before he died, I left on a leadership retreat in the boundary waters of MN with my friend George and my youth pastor, Tom. I knew the day I left that I very well would never see my grandfather again. He was barely recognizable from all the weight he lost and could hardly talk by the time I left. I spent 9 amazing days up north, deepening my relationship with God and just getting away from the hard times of home. Our last night of the trip, we as a group took turns doing a fire watch through the night. This consisted of each one of us spending hour long shifts in the middle of the night keeping the fire going and having quiet time with God. I had really wrestled with the thought of losing my grandpa because I hadn't really ever experienced death before. It was such a tough concept coming to terms with never seeing someone in this lifetime again. I was awoken for my shift of fire watching at 12:30. I quietly spent time with the Lord and asked him to calm my heart and soul in the wake of potentially losing grandpa. I looked to the stars... There were about a million of them in the dark sky. I closed my eyes and felt God's presence rushing over me, just assuring me that it would ALL be okay. I looked at my watch and saw that it was 1:15 a.m. and my shift was nearly over. I thanked the Lord for being my safety and comfort and quickly headed back into my tent for bed. The next day, we headed home from the retreat. A fast seven hour drive went by and my parents picked me up and shared news with me. My grandpa, John, passed away that night at 1:15 a.m.

That was pretty profound.

One of the more recent experiences I have had was last January. I had the AMAZING opportunity of taking a J-term class abroad, studying psychology. Our class traveled to Germany, Austria, France and England in the span of about 3 1/2 weeks. It is one of the most memorable trips I have ever been on.
In Germany, we spent three days in Munich. Munich is a large city, and just a quick train ride to Dachau, where the first concentration camp of World War II still remains. Me being the history nerd that I am, I have always wanted to visit a concentration camp. I knew leading up to it that I would have an interesting experience touring the camp. Our class headed to Dachau on a Sunday morning. It was an incredibly cold day and the snow was falling as we walked to the camp entrance. I can't really explain to you what it feels like to stand in a place that was once home to so much injustice, pain, suffering, and death. All I can say is that it's eery beyond what you would expect. There are two memories from that day that stick out to me. One occurred after spending a quick twenty minutes in an outdoor chapel that was built in memory of the Jews who died in the camp. Our professor gave a quick devotion on Dietrich Bonhoeffer, a German theologian who died during WWII. Everyone I was surrounded by would not SHUT UP about how cold they were, how much they wanted to leave, and how hungry they were for lunch (since we left for Dachau around breakfast, a lot of us skipped out on our meal). I don't know that I've ever wanted to hit someone in the face more than in that moment. I couldn't help but scream in my head... DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOU ARE?! YOU'RE cold and hungry? We are all bundled up in thick coats and Ugg boots!! People DIED in the dead of winter at this place and often wore nothing but RAGS! And you are sitting here, on the trip of a lifetime, complaining about being cold??! I should say, every person complaining was a girl. Sometimes, I can't stand girls. And yes, I realize, I AM ONE.

Entrance to Dachau "Work makes you free" (The great lie of concentration camps)

The second profound thing that stood out to me about the Dachau experience was that the very next Sunday, I spent the morning church service at Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris. Two extremely different but huge experiences from one Sunday to the next. Kind of profound.


The Europe trip in general was such an amazing experience in my life. I have had a lot of pretty profound experiences. I struggled to think of things when questioned by my friend, and yet they are there. What have you experienced that's profound, recently or far back in the past?

Sometimes it's good to look back at these things because they remind us that life isn't just about the simple things, not that that's not something to live by. Life will always bring about profound experiences, and we have all experienced them.

And that's my little profound insight for the day :-) You're welcome.